The one where I out my spy

[celegorm]

Considering everything else that went down, admitting the cat is spying for me seems somewhat trivial.

Celegorm: *stomach in knots, hurries over to Maglor's house and knocks on the door, hoping his Father isn't inside* Kano? You there?

Maglor: *comes to answer* Tyelko, oh good, it's you. *lets him in*

Celegorm: *steps in, looks over his shoulder, then looks around the room* Are we alone?

Maglor: *nods* Yes, Nelyo's out with the twins... Why? What is it? *has his own ideas, but Cele seems more anxious than he expected*



Celegorm: *exhales deeply* Father has lost his fucking mind. I mean, I know he's crazy and has been for years, but now I think he's lost grip with his sanity entrely.

Maglor: *agrees completely* I know. *sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose* I know, but I haven't any idea what to do about it.

Celegorm: I don't know either but when that damned cat drew up replicas of Father's weapon designs, I knew I had to do something.

Maglor: The cat drew up... What cat? Wait, nevermind, that's not very important. I have something better. Worse. *retrieves Fëanor's notes* Here.

Celegorm: There's a talking cat that I pay with fish to spy on...well, whatever. It's strange and complicated and...*takes the notes* Sweet mother of pearl...*reads through them*

Maglor: I'm sure there are more notes, but these are all I could take...

Celegorm: *flips the pages over* Does he plan to destroy the city and take us all straight to Mordor? I mean, really...

Maglor: He says not, but he's not thinking straight. Even if he didn't replicate a nuclear weapon exactly, the unintended effects of anything improvised based on those concepts is going to go drastically wrong.

Celegorm: *isn't familiar with nuclear weapons, but guesses they are bad* It all looks very complicated. Based on my experience, the more compliated something is, the more ways it can possibly screw up. *flips over a page* According to this, a single weapon can destroy thousands of miles of land. So if one goes off accidentally, BOOM.

Maglor: Even if one only went off where it was meant to, there's no way to get it deep enough into Morgoth's stronghold to prevent the effects from reaching across Beleriand. *kind of furious at Fëanor, now that they're discussing it* And it wouldn't just be ravaged and burned earth, it would be poison and sickness for years to come! *reminds himself to breathe, this is not Cele's fault*

Celegorm: Awesome. *rubs his forehead* And if that's not bad enough...*pulls the silmaril from his pocket*...there's this. I lied to Father about having it but he knows. And I know he's coming back for it.

Maglor: *stares at it, exhaling slowly* Yes. I ran into him the other day, on accident. *looks back to Celegorm's face* He wants it back.

Celegorm: He's not getting it back. There's no doubt in my mind he's going to use it to fuel this weapons he's designing. He already has one. Just imagine if he gets the second one. Eru help us if the third one turns up.

Maglor: I hope it never does... If only Curvo were here.

Celegorm: Well, he's not. It's just us and Maitimo, who I assume knows, and we have to figure out what to do with it. It can't stay at my house. Lio told Turu that I had it, and that mouth breather wants me to give it back to Father. Sometimes I wonder if he has two functioning brain cells. Who in their right mind would even suggest that?

Maglor: I did tell Nelyo. I'm rather hoping he can convince father to...exercise some sanity. Maedhros hasn't really been much a part of this, so maybe father won't be so mistrustful of him. Though that's doubtful. *ruefully* And he'll not take my word anytime in the next age.

Celegorm: Nor mine. He knew I was lying about having the silm, and it's only a matter of time before he tears my house up looking for it. *shoves it back in his pocket* I can't exactly bury it in the backyard, though.

Maglor: No... *muses* Tempting to throw it in the lake... *not quite serious*

Celegorm: That's where I found it in the first place. *wry smile* Any other ideas?

Maglor: I'd say break it, if we could. *shrugs, sighing*

Celegorm: *frowns* Unbreakable. I've tried that, too. I'll think of something. In the mean time, *punches Maglor's shoulder, hard* What the hell are you doing sleeping with that knuckle-dragging asshole, Turu?

Maglor: Ow! *jeez, so much fraternal abuse lately* I haven't slept with him!

Celegorm: *arches an eyebrow* That's not what I heard.

Maglor: *mirrors his expression* No? Been talking to Turu then, have you? I'm skeptical.

Celegorm: *snorts* Hardly. I'd rather gnaw off my own arm than have to listen to his banal attempts at conversation. I have other sources.

Maglor: It's your bloody spycat, isn't it.

Celegorm: *smug grin* Maybe.

Maglor: *his turn to punch Celegorm, hard* You're such an ass!

Celegorm: *laughs and rubs his arm* Ow! I'm trying to look out for you. Obviously, you have no taste or common sense, so it's up to me to keep you from making any tragic mistakes.

Maglor: I like a challenge! Besides, how is it all that different from you dating Ecthelion? Wait, don't answer that. What's far worse is that father knows. *groan*

Celegorm: Father knows about that, too? Damn, Kano. How hard is it for you to keep a secret? You need to learn how to lie.

Maglor: I have no idea how he knows. *scowls* The most public thing we've ever done is had dinner together. Which by the way, I haven't slept with him.

Celegorm: I sure as hell didn't tell him. But, really...can't you find someone better than Turu? He's an idiotic egomanic who names everything he owns Idril and wants to give Father the silms.

Maglor: *wickedly* Like who, Theoden?

Celegorm: *rolls his eyes* You'd have to pry him off of Father's cock first. Ugh. If anyone is worse than Turu, it's him. Whiny little brat.

Maglor: *grimaces; NOT a picture he wants in his head* Ugh, Tyelko. Turu's not so bad. Though why I'd ever try to convince you of that, I don't know.

Celegorm: Don't bother trying. I've known Turu all my life, and his reputation as an asshat is firmly established.

Maglor: *amused really* Yes, yes.

Celegorm: I really do wish you'd find someone else to go out with. At least explore other options. There's a city full of lovely elves and you're going out with your cousin.

Maglor: *shrugs* Runs in the family, I guess. *not really all that bothered about whether or not Cele approves*

Celegorm: Don't get me started. *thinks Fingon is a wuss*

Maglor: Fair enough. But if your cat spies on me again, I'll drown it.

Celegorm: He's not my cat. He's Theoden's cat. *grins* And I've been using him to spy on Father, too.

Maglor: I'll still do it.

Celegorm: *shrugs* If you can catch him, have at it. I'm not much of a cat person. If Lio didn't love them, we wouldn't have that kitten, either.

Maglor: *wryly* Then as a brotherly favour, kindly quit spying on me.

Celegorm: *ignores that comment* If you think of anywhere to hide the silm, let me know. It has to go somewhere.

Maglor: *nods, glancing at it* So it doesn't burn, then?

Celegorm: No, though it did glow more when it was close to the other one.

Maglor: *rubs his forehead* Well. I'll think.

Celegorm: Yeah, I will too. And tell Maitimo that we need to talk, if you see him. *heads to the door* Good night, Kano.

Maglor: *nods* I will. Be careful, Tyelkormo.